Three

I found these while parusing old blogs of mine:

"I read something about how scientists found a planet that is very similar to Earth 20 lightyears away.

Does it occur to anyone else that this means we're the alien race that's looking for a planet to take over and make our own?"

and:

"I had a dream last night where I was at a house party and my friend was making out with Henry VIII. I then remember falling asleep on a golden chair and this guy was inside the chair and we were talking and I remember that he told me he definitely wasn't the glowing thing inside the chiar.

I have got to remember not to eat dairy before bed."

I remember that second one. It was a fucked up dream.
I'm pretty sure the guy turned out to be the glowing thing inside the chair.